“Acting like a Democrat”

If you have read this psychotic story of mine to this point, and still buy into it, that is if you are quite mature and have gone through a full life, you would probably have started to get a sense of the impending danger- not that attacking the coup like I did was a funny and humorous thing, but that the future was seriously dangerous for me.

There was a definite risk that I was getting closer and closer to the edge of my sanity and also in mortal physical danger. Certainly I was playing with fire, and things like the Amart friend and his high-society club were very serious about their agenda and beliefs and I certainly gave them an excuse to hate me. The events that followed would indicate that all I have said and done, was only a beginning - and that it would result in those famous words from the movie “Apocalypse Now” which is to “Terminate with Extreme Prejudice.”

Well I am no Marlon Brando playing a character in a movie, who was chopped to pieces and died willingly because he wanted out of his life. But back in reality in Thailand, the fascist reactionary far right thugs or the Yellow Shirts was very active, wielding machete, guns and bombs.

The Samak government folded as a result of a technicality in that Samak was barred from politics, by a court ruling, for having gone on a television cooking show and accepted transportation money. Samak getting zapped like that in Thailand is again like the famous words by the character Martin Sheen played in “Apocalypse Now” when he said killing Kurt, the Marlon Brando character, was like giving out speeding tickets at the Indy 500.

Samak, the right winger who had been used by Thaksin to appease the military and Amart but had failed to do so, was replaced by Somchai. Somchai, a cousin of Thaksin, then again terminated by a court ruling.

My contribution to critical thinking and journalism, about was to compare the Yellow Shirts with the Nazis in Germany before the burning of the Reichstag. I literally was the first guy who made the comparison and called the Yellow Shirts, what they are and that was a bunch of Fascist Thugs.

The Yellow Shirts of course invaded Government House and finally Bangkok air port, cutting off tourists and businessmen - and also causing what a Thai central bank official estimated as damage to the economy of about US$5 billion. In addition they would do things like drive around town shooting at their enemies or dragging suspected enemies into their gathering and beating them up.

But you get the idea of what sort of danger I was in. I was going deeper and deeper into my insanity and my enemies were real. It is in hindsight now, that I realize that they were going far beyond trying to stop my writings, but wanted to teach me a lesson, to land me in jail, to get me as a trophy, to hurt me physically - or even to kill me, as the following pages will demonstrate.

But now in this story, it is still about the Democrat Party that I was working for. And one of the first things the MP I advised me told me was that the Democrat Party needed an undercover cyber warrior to fight with Thaksin who controlled the cyber world and had a huge following among those who surfed the internet. So I started the blog thaiintelligetnews.blogspot.com. And if you researched the blog, my early day’s writings there are about building up the Democrat Party.

Personally, there was a “tick” of progress with my character, but it was not free will, but because shortage of money saw me starting to get serious about losing weight and cutting back on whoring, partying and drinking. But deep down also I felt a sense that I was lost and needed a change in direction. That is if I was lucky and survived the assassination attempt. Like that management guru, Tom Peters says, “the more mistakes you make, the more prefect you become” he added off course “If it doesn’t kill you first!”

I knew even then that my time at the Democrat Party would be short. That is how my multiple personality works. As each person that makes up me goes wandering about, leaving the present one in control of my worldly behavior, those people that make up the totality of me, would keep giving me hunches and signals.

But one day, the MP I advised called a gathering of three and it comprised of him, the actor and me. The question was what the Democrat Party should do about the Yellow Shirt occupation of the government compounds. My advice was put on a distance and say outright that the Democrat Party disagreed. The next day, the actor friend called me up and said my advice was the right thing to do, but the wrong thing politically. Politically, it was great for the party that the Yellow Shirts were occupying government compounds because it was destabilizing the government and pushing it out of office - and could result in the democrat party stepping in.

I never returned to work for the MP after that and refused to take his phone calls. I told my actor friend that I was no good for the Democrat Party because I still was loyal to Thaksin and for me Thailand came first, not politics.

So while my friend the actor and the Democrat Party had won the day, I would sit in the front seat of the MP's Mercedes as he sat in the back seat bad mouthing Thaksin as a way of kissing the MP’s butt.
 
What they off course failed to count on, was thaiintelligentnews and that while I was butt kissing, there were still loyal fans of mine, who were ready to forgive me and follow my writings again. And this time, I really stung my enemies, not because I was back with a vengeance or anything like that, but because thaiintelligentnews was in English - my first language that I excelled in.

Personality wise, I still was very corrupt as indicated by the Bangkok Governor incident. The owner of the High-Society pub called me up and said his close friend was having some legal entanglement with the city and needed the Democrat Part city’s governor help in clearing up the mess. Being corrupt as I was, I immediately responded by saying that I would ask the MP I was advising to help out, but that should come with some campaign contribution. Off course it may have been a setup of some sort, to expose me and end my time with the Democrat Party, now that they thought they had destroyed my credibility as a Thaksin supporter. But whatever, I felt a real sense that for the first time, I wasn’t doing something wrong, with little impact, but I was involved with a real corruption attempt that would hurt the country.

It felt bad doing what I did, but it also helped me discover my limits and to think twice about corruption in general. It was like Tom Peters said, a mistake that gave the opportunity to learn, improve and most importantly -not make the same mistake again. Yes I still had a long way to go, but it was a start.